Attention All Husbands:

Read Ephesians 5:25

by Bryan Gibson

It says: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.” Husbands have a pattern to follow—Christ’s love for the church. That being the case, here are some different ways this commandment can be expressed.

Husbands, submit to your wives. That seems to conflict with the previous verse (v. 24), but as verse 21 points out, there is a sense in which we must all submit to one another. A husband submits to his wife in the same way Christ submits to the church, by giving Himself for her (Ephesians 5:25), by looking out for her interests as well as his own (Philippians 2:3-8); and by providing for her every need (Philippians 4:19).

Husbands, share all your riches (whether many or few) with your wives. Christ certainly does that for the church, blessing her with “every spiritual blessing” (Ephesians 1:3), and bestowing upon her the “exceeding riches of his grace” (Ephesians 1:7-8; 2:7). Husbands may not be able to offer what Christ does, but what they do have they need to share with their wives. “What’s mine is yours” is the attitude husbands must have toward their wives, because that is the very attitude Christ has toward His bride, the church.

Husbands, love your wives—even when they don’t love you. That’s not easy to do, but that’s exactly what Christ did—“while were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). “In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us...” (1 John 4:10). Husbands, love your wives, even if they don’t return it, even if you don’t think they deserve it. “For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have?” (Matthew 5:46).

Husbands, don’t put more on your wives than they can bear. Christ certainly doesn’t do that to His bride: “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest...you will find rest for your souls...My yoke is easy and My burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). What a wonderful example for husbands. Don’t put a heavy yoke on your wives. Don’t micromanage them, and don’t make it impossible to please you (food is not good enough; house is not clean enough, etc.). If you’re not careful, they may find it easier to please the Lord than to please you.

Husbands, be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. That’s the commandment given in Ephesians 4:32, but notice what follows: “even as God in Christ forgave you...be imitators of God as dear children...walk in love as Christ also has loved us...” (Ephesians 4:32-5:2). Once again, the pattern is established. Husbands, treat your wives the way Christ treats you.

Husbands, love your wives—even through the worst of times. “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?” (Romans 8:35). We know the answer to that, don’t we? If Christ doesn’t abandon His bride when the going gets rough, neither should a husband abandon his wife. She may get sick; she may even become an invalid. She may gain more weight than you would like. Her in-laws may become difficult. Together you may experience some financial problems. Whatever difficulties arise, remember this: God has joined you together; don’t let anything or anyone tear you apart.